The natural hair explosion seems to be taking over certain parts of the United States. African American women everywhere are getting away from the relaxers and some are even letting go of their weaves. They are owning and wearing their hair in its natural state and embracing their coiled coifs and natural roots.
Just turn on any television and you will see Black women and girls in various TV commercials as well as mainstream television shows in all of their natural glory donning, “wash n go’s” “twist outs” and “braids/twists”, etc. Many women have very understanding husband’s who respect and support their decisions to go natural. But not all women have this support. That’s why I was happy to run across a post on this very subject by Dr. Corey Guyton on his blog The Genuine Scholar. In his post, “The Reasons I Did Not Want My Wife To Be Natural“, he digs deep to examine why he was initially against his wife wearing her hair natural.
Growing up in a country where the standards are based on Eurocentric values, I fell into the trap of thinking that my definition of beauty was supposed to be the same as their definition of beauty…
This is just one of the pieces of his important self evaluation to understand why he was against it initially. He also went a step further by creating a video to encourage other men to understand why they should support their wives in their decision to go natural.
Its Your Hair & You Don’t Need To Ask Permission – Video
[youtube id=”Xsar1JGC90Y”]
I enjoy when a person can adequately go inside themselves to find the roots of the problems that they may be having an issue with. I love seeing that light bulb come on when they realize that they just may have been wrong about something. Self realization. To me this shows maturity and intelligence. Everyone knows that a happy wife equals a happy life so I am also really glad that he didn’t try to go against her on her decision. Its hard enough when we have the rest of the world against us and our beauty as Black women so I think its important for our men to support us. Thank you Dr. Guyton for doing just that!
To our readers with natural hair. Was your mate supportive of your decision to go natural? If he wasn’t would that affect your decision to go for it?
My SO was very supportive of me going natural. In fact, he suggested I go natural before I even mentioned I was considering it. The transition of course was difficult for me, but he kept telling me how beautiful and strong my hair was and while I was struggling with finding the right products, he did his own research and bought me natural shea butter and avocado oil which has been such a life saver!
In the past, I dated someone that suggested I get weave because he was used to high maintenance girls that cared about their looks. Needless to say, that didn’t last very long.
Awesome! Thanks for sharing. Support from your husband or boyfriend is important. But ultimately it is our choice!
First off allow me to say that our essence is unmatchable. I am glad to see my sistas embrace who they are. Since I have been natural (about 3 yrs now) I have felt as though I now know who I am. Now, my husband on the other hand really dislikes the real me. I don’t feel sorry for him nor have I tried to please him by straightening or chemically treating my hair. He likes straight hair, and in my opinion (from the words of my girl India) I am not my hair. So ladies, continue on because evolution has come!
congrats to you for doing you! Thanks for sharing -)
I have never had chemically treated hair. I normally wear my hair straight, all the time! When I started wearing wash n go’s and twistouts, it was very hard on him. He loves hair. As long I was able to give it the luster/shine, softness, and body that he admired then he was absolutely in love with it.
Thats awesome Kera! Thanks for sharing!
My husband was ALL for it (natural hair) frm day 1! I wrk out at least 3 days a week and goin to the salon weekly was a waste…
I talked w/him about cutting my shoulder length permed hair and goin natural. He was ALL for it (he wears dreads).
He pointed out that he didn’t date me for my hair, he’d notice my body first! I did the big chop a few days later, that was 3 yrs ago, I’m 25 lbs lighter and we absolutely LOVE my natural state 🙂
You are truly blessed Danuielle, its nice to have the support from the very beginning! thanks for sharing