Do you have a good or better yet great marriage? Have you and your spouse mastered certain areas of your relationship? Maybe you have uncovered the key to effective communication, or perhaps you have been successful in keeping the passion burning after so many years of marriage. Whatever it may be, I am guessing there is a couple in your immediate circle who would greatly benefit in hearing how you’ve done it.
Marriages, in general, are under attack. It is so easy for us to become complacent, get lazy or simply walk away from a marriage without putting up a good fight. It’s easy because there aren’t enough people willing to help when they clearly see a couple in trouble. The bigger problem is that most couples aren’t willing to ask other people for guidance, unfortunately they would rather suffer in silence. And on the other side, there aren’t enough people willing to share what they know, or admit they have had struggles. I am not sure if it is because of the images we want to portray, but I think the secret is out….. most marriages have had to deal with some sort of challenge. This is a relationship reality.
We don’t have to possess the title of Pastor, Therapist or Counselor in order to impart words of wisdom on how to build and maintain a strong partnership. If you are willing to take a struggling couple under your wing in order to encourage, inspire and uplift them, you could possibly be just what they need to keep moving forward. We need one another. All it takes is a kind word every now and then or maybe a quick call just to check in or even an invitation to a special event for couples only. Praying with and for another couple is the most impactful of all of the above. It will remind them that someone cares about the success of their marriage and the significance of keeping God as their primary focus.
If you are unsure on exactly what to say, here are a few inspiring words for other couples:
“You have a beautiful family” – helps to remind couples of the blessings that come with having a family.
“My spouse and I will be celebrating 10 years of marriage this year, it feels great to have overcome some of those early challenges “ – demonstrates that all couples have obstacles and may make them feel comfortable opening up and discussing theirs.
“I am so happy I learned not to be afraid to admit when I’m wrong, it has truly saved my marriage” – makes others feel more comfortable accepting responsibility for their own actions.
“We will be having a couple’s movie night next weekend, would love for you and your spouse to attend” – just being around other couples is inspiration enough.
“I started my day off right by praying with my spouse” – subtly encourages others to pray with their partners.
Can you imagine what would happen if more of us stepped out of our comfort zones and used what we know or learned along the way to help others? What an impact that would have on our relationships.
BMWK, how do you minister to other couples?
I agree. Your Pastor should be the first person you speak to since God has blessed them to be an example in your life. But you should also seek wisdom from other married couples who are in a stable relationship and have shown evidence of being a godly marriage. The Lord can also lead you to a married couple for you to speak that can help your marriage, if you open your heart to him and allow him to guide you. Lastly, be careful who you speak to. Some people don’t care about you but rather just want to be in your business so please pray first and ask the Lord to help guide you in this.
Tiya Cunningham-Sumter says
All excellent points Niambi!
Paul H. Byerly says
The pastor does not have the time to do this for every couple who needs it. If each couple with a good marriage will help another couple or two, the results will be huge.
Val Fleming says
I agreed. My best friend once told me, “Look around in your church and find some older couples, make friends with them because they will tell you what marriage is really all about.” I am still looking. Lol I do believe in “Seek and you shall find.”
Val Fleming says
I agree. My best friend once told me, “Look around in your church and find some older couples, make friends with them because they will tell you what marriage is really all about.” I am still looking. Lol I do believe in “Seek and you shall find.”