Can’t Date Jesus
A lot of Christian women have lofty, unrealistic expectations of men. If the man isn’t perfect like Jesus, then he needs to be like the pastor. In the minds of these men, they think many women are either trying to gain the attention of the pastor, marry the pastor or date his clone. They think Christian women need to allow a man to have the ability to be himself, make mistakes and be human.
I must admit, I was shocked by some of these statements, I’m guilty of a couple myself. But please understand, this article isn’t meant to divide, shed blame, or stir up controversy. It’s only meant to address the real feelings some Christians feel when it comes to the topic of dating. And we just want to give you the best Christian dating advice. Hopefully, both of these articles have shed one light on the work that needs to be done and/or the stereotypes that need to be broken in our relationships. When you know better, you can do better.
BMWK – What do you think? Do you agree with these points about why Christian men prefer dating non-Christian women?
Up Next: Dating As A Christian: Do You Have To Be Worldly To Be Dateable?
Editor’s Note – This post was originally published on Nov 16, 2016, and has been updated for quality and relevancy.
R. Robinson says
R. Robinson says
I agree. This is good information for both men and women to be armed with. I’ve been exposed to a very broad mix of cultures in various churches in my nearly half century of living and I’ve experienced a lot of this, most often by far, among Christian’s of ethnicity but its my experience that these issues are especially pronounced in my community; the black community and I believe it’s definitely cultural. We (blacks/African Americans) have a lot of healing and building to do, as a culture. I think there’s no better place to begin than the discussion, the healing and the building than the church.
Kevin M Hawkins says
I think most of these answers are simply cop-outs! In fact, almost every one of the reasons listed are not really issues unique to christian women, but MOST women! I think christian men should keep it real with themselves… if a christian woman is not your cup of tea, just say so. But don’t come up with these reasons, because you’re gonna find these issues in the dating scene… church girl or not!
Just my $.02
Darryl W. says
Kevin, I totally agree!! Cop outs for not at least trying to be a godly man while dating! I found it strange that sex was not mentioned as a reason, because we KNOW that Christian men (and women) are “getting busy” though they’re not married! I hear it all the time. Whereas a woman who isn’t a Christian, that won’t be as much of an issue, which is exactly where some “godly” men wanna go!! Step up and be the man Hid has called you to be and I’ll bet you find Christian women who will be the women you want them to be!!
I dont date Christian women mainly cause of the flakery. If God wills it and justifying all emotions with bible and scripture when in reality it’s just their own voice. Gossip,if it doesnt work out oh the talk that goes around church and all the sisters dont wanna know you. When they describe a Godly man they want he sounds more like a pastor and how many actually have this calling?
You dont really get to know the woman at church you get to know their Christian persona, who are they really? Who knows youre talk9ng too much Christianese to find out who they actually are. Then theres the legalism formed on how a date should he when in reality dating is the exact same way just without the fornication, I mean c’mon, should know what the sins are by now why create legalistic approach to dating.. A lot of women create this web of legalism not for Godliness but more so to protect themselves from getting hurt, but instead it just keeps brothers away, so in that respect it’s working you will never get a chance to be hurt. I stopped a long time ago and have noticed even marriages within the church are at an all time high.
Den De says
I think you should interview real Christian men the next time.
I think some of whats written here..may be painfully true…but it actually goes both ways..as Ive also seen men exhibit some of these things the women are said to
Thomas Jay says
These are the most honest responses that I have personally have dealt with myself. I refuse to meet and or date another woman from church as a result. My business is none of the pastors, he should focus on his wife and not my relationship..