The decision to get married is a joyful decision, but it isn’t always an easy one. Of course there are instances when someone just knows the person they are dating is the “one,” but it’s not always that simple. Sometimes people have doubts.
The presence of doubt can mean a lot of things, and doubt isn’t always a bad thing. As a matter of fact, doubt is sometimes present, so you can stop and think things through. Doubt forces you to examine the things that bother you most. And while some doubts are really just manifestations of our fears, many of our doubts protect us.
If you are dating someone and you are starting to wonder if he’s the “one,” you probably have a lot on your mind. Is this the right man for me? Does he treat me well? Is he the person I was meant to be with for life? Do I want to have kids with him?
And once you get to the point where marriage is even a consideration, the biggest question is this: Does this person have all the qualities I am looking for in a husband? It’s a simple question, but determining the answer requires a lot of insight and a great deal of honesty. When you think you’re in love, you can see what you want to see instead seeing what’s actually there.
Here are five qualities you should look for in your future husband. If he doesn’t have them, he’s not husband material.
You can love a man who behaves irresponsibly, but do you really want that man to be your husband? Marriage comes with a lot of responsibility, and when you choose a spouse, you are asking that person to exhibit their ability to be responsible in countless ways. If you love a man who seems consistently immature and irresponsible, he’s not husband material until he’s able to change.
He cares about your dreams
Even if he doesn’t share your personal dreams, he should still care about those dreams and offer his support. Your dreams are a part of you, and they matter. Anyone you consider spending the rest of your life with should care about those dreams simply because he cares about you.
He accepts you as you are
People have the power to change, but only if that is what they want to do. Don’t marry anyone who is hoping to change who you are. Your man doesn’t have to think you are perfect, but he also shouldn’t be looking to change who you are. If he doesn’t love you enough to spend his life with you just as you are, then he’s not husband material.
He’s a man of integrity
If you are with a man who says one thing and does another, don’t walk down that aisle. Marriage is a major commitment, and the man you decide to marry should be a man of integrity. As his wife, you need to have confidence in what he says and does. Without that, you will lose respect for him and the marriage will suffer.
He respects you
Marriage and disrespect are like oil and vinegar—they just don’t mix. Respect is at the core of any lasting relationship. When you choose to say “I do” to a man who doesn’t respect you, you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of pain. Even if you love him, don’t marry a man who doesn’t respect you. You deserve respect, and it should never be negotiable.
BMWK ladies, how did you know your man was marriage material?