Listening to music today is totally different from years ago. Romance has been replaced with role reversal, explicit sex, and stories of unhealthy relationships.

Somewhere between the promiscuity and the perceived lack of good men, relationships have gone astray. Both sexes are complaining about the other and it appears that more division, than unity is taking place.

In the midst of the chaos and the confusion prevalent in relationships, we have missed the reason why we are together- because we need each other.

I’ve had countless conversations with frustrated men regarding their relationships. The overwhelming problem is that they don’t know how to make the women in their lives happy. It seems that there is something missing in the relationship which is causing dissatisfaction.

Men will quickly run down the laundry list of material things that they’ve showered their women with. But in spite of their efforts, something is still missing. This frustration leads to the question: What do women REALLY want?

I would like to answer that question with one simple word, YOU.

When I explain that women like the stuff, but what they really want is YOU, the person, men immediately begin to protest, proclaiming they give themselves completely to the women in their lives. But do they really?

Giving yourself to the woman you love is not meeting a physical or mental requirement. Women want you, the person. And, they want to participate in your life experiences.

Related: 3 Truths he wants to tell you but may not know how

Women want to be a part of your life. Women understand and know that you are a fixer by nature; but they want to be a part of the solution. They don’t want you to hide in your man cave when things go wrong.

They want you to confide in them and find solace that you can work things out together.
Women want you to be emotionally free to love them. They want to know that they are your number one and not your second or third choice.

This isn’t insecurity speaking, it is the reality that a woman can tell when you are emotionally unavailable. Women just want you to be emotionally invested in them, just as they are with you. If you aren’t, then say so. PLEASE don’t lead a woman to believe otherwise. Unfortunately, that scenario is a headache waiting to happen.

Men, the bottom-line is that women want to be your partner. They want to be a part of your journey. Women love the fact that you want to be the provider and the protector, but let them into your life. Women want you to be transparent and vulnerable. And for a lot of men that is scary. But why?

Related: How can I be transparent and vulnerable in my marriage? 4 Strategies to use today.

In order to have a solid mature relationship, you have to be vulnerable with one another. It can be frightening at first, but it is necessary. Most people don’t want to be transparent because they don’t want to share their hurts, pains and scars.

But remember, your woman has them too. Realize that you aren’t sharing yourself with a stranger but with the woman you profess to love, and who loves you. As much as you tried to hide your pain, your woman sees right through you. So when she ask what’s wrong, she isn’t nagging, she just wants to be a part of the solution.

Open yourself and invite the special woman in your life to walk out your life journey with you. In doing so, together you will make mistakes, you will miss the mark, but you will eventually get it right and you will get it right together. So the next time you are wondering what your woman wants, realize that the answer is you!

BMWK Men, are you willing to be what your woman really wants?