You might be familiar with the famous quote “Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions, they become habits. Watch your habits, they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.” Well just like in life, the same thing applies to your relationships: especially the part about your thoughts becoming your … [Read more...]
I’ve Experienced a Lot of Adversity in My Life: What Can I Do to Remain Optimistic?
Hey Dr. B, I have been going through some things in my personal life, and I do not know how to move on. I work very hard to remain positive and upbeat, but I have experienced a lot of adversity in my life. I was abused as a child, abandoned by my mother who used drugs and even experienced homelessness at one time. My mind is a mess. However, I keep pushing on because God has … [Read more...]
Ask Buckingham: I Have a Negative Attitude and Difficulty Thinking Positively
Dr. Buckingham, I have experienced a lot of hardship and adversity in my life and I have very hard time when it comes to thinking positively. My family and friends tell me that I have a very negative attitude and they do not like to be around me because I strike out in anger. I realize that I cannot keep being so negative, but I do not know how to think positively. Sometimes … [Read more...]
Be Happy and Loving….on Purpose!
by Keisha D. Hines, As a child, I always knew I’d graduate from college, get married and have a child. But most importantly, I KNEW I’d be happy. I wanted to be happy and so I was. I was able to discern between feigned happiness and real happiness. I witnessed couples at church holding hands and smiling, but not saying a word to each other in more private settings. Mothers, … [Read more...]
Three Things That Are More Likely To Fail Than Your Marriage
Just about any time a marriage conversation comes up the old stat gets thrown out, "More than half of all marriages fail." It's like they're trying to convince you that your odds of staying married are about the same as getting struck by lightning while riding a unicorn right after you win the lotto. According to the National Center for Health Statistics, about 43 percent … [Read more...]
The Power of Positive Thinking Will Transform Your Marriage
My friends are quick to point out how I view the world through rose-colored glasses. They often tease me about my ability to notice the positive in everyone and in every situation and my odd expectation that things will always work out. It's true; it is my nature to have these optimistic expectations. For me it's my faith and belief in GOD. Based on proof from the Word and my … [Read more...]
Banishing “You Never…” And Other Troublesome Phrases From Your Marriage
In my graduate courses this semester, I'm learning how to help families fix their problems while focusing on their strengths. Sounds challenging, and it is, but I'm so grateful this knowledge is spilling over into my marriage. I can admit freely that some resentment had built up between my husband and I because I felt he wasn't holding up his end of the bargain. Can't he see … [Read more...]