In the past I have written about celebrity deaths. Michael Jackson's death turned out to be more painful for me than I anticipated. Teena Marie was a shocker and I didn't really know where to begin so I just wrote what came to mind. But Donna Summer? Like Michael Jackson, this entertainer was particularly integral to my experience growing up in Chicago where house … [Read more...]
Re-Connecting With Your Real Life
I often find myself frustrated with the glaring deficiencies in my teen son's ability to communicate --- what he's saying versus what he means and if he even understands the difference. He says he'll be somewhere when he needs to be picked up but nowadays I can almost gaurantee he'll be somewhere else, waiting for me to call to announce that his driver has arrived. His plans … [Read more...]
Getting Your Teens Responsible About Their Finances
As a young man I struggled with the management of my finances. This was due in part to my father's control and silence over the money I made from my neighborhood lawn-mowing gig. He would leave me with a couple dollars, take the bulk of the money I made, deposit it into a credit union account and that was that. No explanation and no conversation. And he almost dared me to … [Read more...]
You Get What You Pay For
A couple weeks back when news of the $5 billion Facebook IPO broke I thought to myself, "I seriously needed to be in on that!" along with a few other choice words of regret. And I'm sure I'm not alone. As I read the articles and the list of investors who will soon be new billionaires or solidly established millionaires well into the hundreds of millions, I had much … [Read more...]
Would You Cut Off Your Marriage If It Was Your Hand?
After going over some bible verses and catching up on some personal development reading, I recently had a revelation about marriage. Both the institution and my own. I suddenly realized that I was missing a key piece of common sense information that can serve as a guide for me to all but ensure the success of my marriage. And what is this little gold nugget? My marriage and my … [Read more...]
Fatherhood In Black: Tray Chaney
Welcome to the inaugural post of Fatherhood In Black. NAME: Tray Chaney OCCUPATION: Entertainer (The Wire, Something The Lord Made, Fatherhood) AGE: 30 STATUS: Married HOW MANY KIDS: 2 KID(S) AGES: 5 years old YOUR ONE SENTENCE STATEMENT/FEELING ON FATHERHOOD: Our kids are the future! We have to be there for them! It's easy to debate with words and … [Read more...]
Ways To Enjoy 2012…And Your Marriage
There's no denying that 2011 was tough. But now it's a New Year, but is it a New You? It's in the days after Christmas and the first week or so of January that everywhere you turn people profess their desire to "begin again!" Although January is just another month, using the beginning of the year as a starting point can be healthy. The following are some strategies, NOT … [Read more...]
Don’t Shut Out The One Who Loves You
There's always a reason to just get by in this life"”in the workplace, in traffic, at the grocery store or anywhere else you come into contact with other people. The following are just a couple of the reasons: Everyone else is doing it. It works. I'm tired. I'm not trying to go there. No one cares about me. I have to look out for Number One. These coping … [Read more...]
“The Talk” Isn’t The Only Talk To Be Had
As parents when talking about "The Talk" we all mean the same thing: talking to our kids about sex. As far as subjects go, this tops the list as being the most important for reasons from irresponsible procreation to contracting diseases. But what about the other talks you could and/or should be having with your kids? The Better Virtues of Manhood Talk - Being a man is about … [Read more...]
6 Tips For Eating Together As A Family
Now that the holidays are upon us, images of food and eating it in large groups as family and friends are commonplace. Everywhere you can think of actually, from the sides of city buses to the glaring repetitive commercials airing during all your favorite television programming. 'Tis the season to be jolly! as the saying goes. But what about those other days? The ones that … [Read more...]
Are You An Internet Dignitary Or Gangster?
If social media has done anything besides shrink the degrees of separation between humans down to about one, it has all but destroyed common courtesy. People who really don't know one another and seemingly purchased their manners from a broken 25-cent gumball machine address each other as if they've known each other for years --- as if they're cool. And let's make the … [Read more...]
Make Love, Not War
The advice in the title of this piece is almost always easier said than done. The consequences of the first are so much sweeter than the second, no matter how much territory, money or reputation stands to be earned in the process. There comes that occasional point in time during marriage when neither husband nor wife sees eye to eye on much. Tensions are running high at work … [Read more...]
Should You Marry Equally Yoked?
Marriage can be a source of immeasurable joy or pain, sometimes both. A marriage not only impacts the two principal players"”the husband and wife and their children, but creates a ripple effect out across everyone they know and care about, for better or worse. Psychologists, counseslors, drug companies and in some truly unfortunate cases, police officers and detectives are in … [Read more...]
Good Dad, Bad Dad
Growing up I feared, was in awe of and often detested my father. He was stern and mostly emotionless. If and when he did laugh it was at things that weren't funny. Now that I'm grown we are the best of friends. He is my confidant and my most staunch advocate. But back when I was under his roof and he was putting food on my plate, he often went upside my head first and asked … [Read more...]
10 Real-World Tips To Spice Up Your Marriage
The battle of the sexes rages on even in and maybe because of marriage. There are two truths constantly in play and not always playing nicely together. Maybe that's because we refer to it as a battle? Too many times spouses get caught up in pointless and perpetual battles for superiority and "rightness" inside the home and out. The idea of working together is an often … [Read more...]