Say what you want about the state of black marriage, but you know we think black love is stronger than ever. Exhibit A: Sharonda and Morris LeBlanc, a newlywed couple with more than a few degrees between them. How did they two meet? Morris says: "[We] met while running track at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte. We competed in the same events (jumps) so I got … [Read more...]
Black Dads, Hit Hard By The Recession, Embrace New Roles As Stay-At-Home Fathers
From our friends over at Loop21.com: With the recession raging on, black men are fighting higher-than-ever unemployment rates. The latest unemployment rates recorded in August 2011 found that unemployment among black males reached 18%, the highest in more than 25 years. But as the ax comes down at work and new opportunities dry up, many black fathers are easing into a new … [Read more...]
The Difference Between How Moms And Dads Parent
A couple weeks ago, my husband and I took our two kids to Borders to try to hit get some books for cheap(er) during its going out-of--business sale. It was pandemonium"”people everywhere, snatching up books, leaving some shelves empty. I headed toward the cookbooks with my 4-year-old daughter behind me, and I thought my 3-year-old son was sticking behind with his dad. A … [Read more...]
On Parenthood: The Days Are Long But The Years Are Short
I'm writing this on a Thursday night, and I swear it feels like Friday. Or maybe I just wish it was. My body aches, and my brain has turned to mush. This week actually kicked off this past weekend, when I had to rush my daughter to the ER for an asthma attack that wouldn't respond to her inhaler or nebulizer. Spent the rest of the weekend nursing her back to health and … [Read more...]
Banishing “You Never…” And Other Troublesome Phrases From Your Marriage
In my graduate courses this semester, I'm learning how to help families fix their problems while focusing on their strengths. Sounds challenging, and it is, but I'm so grateful this knowledge is spilling over into my marriage. I can admit freely that some resentment had built up between my husband and I because I felt he wasn't holding up his end of the bargain. Can't he see … [Read more...]
What If Your Spouse Doesn’t Like Your Natural Hair?
It's almost like you can't open an internet browser without stumbling over a natural hair care blog. From Curly Nikki to Afrobella, black women are leaving the chemicals behind in droves and rocking what God gave 'em. I started transitioning to a natural hair style in 2007 after I found out I was pregnant with my son. I didn't want to get a relaxer while I was pregnant, and … [Read more...]
Blended Families Week: A Second Generation Blended Family
For as long as I can remember, I've had three sets of grandparents. My mother's parents, and then my dad's dad (and his second wife) and my dad's mom (and her new husband). My grandparents divorced when my father was a child, and they both hooked up with their long-term partners shortly thereafter. My dad has taken his time to come to terms with this new arrangement, and … [Read more...]
How Often Do You Need A Break From…Everything?
Two weeks ago, I was frustrated by everything and I knew I was close to losing it. To top it off, my graduate classes started on Monday, so I had been going back and forth about whether or not I would try to get away, during my last free weekend for a while. Well, my husband took one look at my mood and booked the hotel room for me so I couldn't back out and waffle on … [Read more...]
Should You Ever Question Your Child’s Teacher?
Ron Clark, the distinguished "Teacher of the Year," featured on Oprah, and the subject of his very own made-for-TV movie, "The Ron Clark Story," has some words for parents about how to make sure your kids succeed. In a column on CNN.com, he argues that parents handicap teachers when they undermine their authority: At times when I tell parents that their child has been a … [Read more...]
How Do Men Best Respond To Requests?
I received a ton of great buzz on my post, "Why Is It So Hard To Ask For What We Want In A Relationship?" I was just speaking from the heart there, and was trying to figure out why my needs weren't getting met and what I needed to do about it. I was exhausted all the time from the never-ending list of "things to do," and part of the exhaustion was because I was harboring … [Read more...]
Four Lessons Learned From My Parents’ 27-Year Marriage
Yesterday, my parents celebrated their 27th wedding anniversary (only reason I can remember the number is I add "+1" to my age. LOL). In all the hustle and bustle of my day to day life, I completely forgot. Oops. But even when I miss the actual date, I will never forget the marriage lessons they've passed on to me, whether they knew it or not. I use some of … [Read more...]
I Married My Father
Growing up, my dad could do no wrong and I followed in his footsteps very carefully. He read the newspaper every day. So did I. He read books like he couldn't get knowledge into his brain fast enough. I've been known to read an entire 250-page book in the bookstore while the rest of my family is still just browsing. My dad never swore, smoke or drank. Even now as a … [Read more...]
VIDEO: Young Girl Bullied For Natural Hair – What’s Your Advice?
This is an older video, but it still shoots daggers into the heart of parents with "natural cuties" everywhere. I admit, I went natural three years ago because I wanted my daughter to have confidence in the curls that grow naturally from her head. But I realize it's not enough for her to simply to hear it from me, because sometimes you don't believe Mommy if everyone else … [Read more...]
Why Is It So Hard To Ask For What We Need In A Relationship?
I'm not ashamed to say that for the past week or so, the grind of being a work-at-home mom was getting to me. I was angry and tired and just ready for someone else to step up and take the wheel while I took a nap in the backseat, you know? I was tired of cleaning the house every day, and working until 3 a.m. and cooking three meals a day and taking care of the kids all day. … [Read more...]
Racist Or Just Dumb: Nivea Ad Equates Afros With Being “Uncivilized”
In a new ad, Nivea attempts to get men to "look like they give a damn" by becoming more "civilized" - in their words, it means cutting the 'fro. Many folks have been in an uproar about the ad, including Roots drummer ?uestlove, who tweeted his displeasure. Other bloggers have called it just plain ignorant, considering the complicated history of black hair in America. Nivea … [Read more...]