A successful marriage doesn’t just happen. It takes planning, learning, and implementing what you learn. These 3 power packed tips have helped my husband and me build a successful marriage.

Just like you, we have to implement things to help our marriage succeed, even when it’s difficult. The tools we have implemented have helped us to maintain our joy and excitement. I hope they help you too.

Take these 3 tips and put them in your marriage tool box and pull them out whenever needed.

Use the “Same Team” Approach

If you have ever played sports, you know that a team divided against itself has little to no chance of winning. However, a team that pulls together, strategizes, and follows the playbook to success has a much stronger chance of winning.

Related: To better understand the “same team” approach, read these 3 things die-hard football fans can teach us about building a strong family

Remember this is your marriage. You are on the same team. Don’t fight against each other. Fight the challenge and win together.

Conduct a Marriage Inventory

At least once a year take a marriage inventory. Set a date and time. Look at what is working well and what needs to be worked on. Ask questions of each other: “How am I doing at meeting your needs as a husband/wife?” Answer the questions using a scale of 1-10.

No matter the answer, be quick to listen without defending your position. Just let your mate express their thoughts and feelings in a non-combative atmosphere. Remember you are on the same team. Once each mate expresses themselves, work together to see how you can move each area of your lives together closer to being a “10”.

Have a Vision for Intimacy

Have a vision for intimacy. This should be sexual and non-sexual. Know what intimacy means to you and your mate.

• Holding hands
• Having your hair brushed
• Getting the back of your neck rubbed
• Having quiet talks

So, what is intimacy to you?

Related: 5 Benefits of great sex you might be taking for granted.

• Are you satisfied in your sexual life together?
• If yes, how can you make it better?
• If no, how can you make it better?

You see, your mate may already have a vision for sexual intimacy that you know nothing about. That’s not good. You need to have a shared vision in this and every area of your marriage. Know what intimacy versus sexual fulfillment means to you and to your mate.

Then do your best to make this a strong honorable part of your marriage. Again, remember you are on the same team.

Related: For more info read this article – Should a Married Couple Have a Vision for Their Sex Life.

It is possible to use this same team approach and see your marriage get better and better. Don’t become complacent with each other, nor take each other for granted.

Put these 3 tools in your marriage toolbox and use them to build something great. Look for and expect more because more is available in your relationship. You can do this! I’m rooting for you.

BMWK, what are some other ways to show you are on the “same team”?