By: Vanessa Thorpe
A couple of days ago, my husband texted me five little words that melted my heart. They served as confirmation that we were doing something right. “I love our life together. That is all the text said.
I do not know what sparked him to send the text, but I am so glad to be reassured that our marriage is solidified with the mutual satisfaction of our oneness.
What makes our marriage so great?
There are a lot of things that make our marriage great. But I think my husband was referring to the way we live our life. One of our favorite mottos is “memories over materials”.
We value creating memories over obtaining material possessions. Owning a big fancy house is nice. But, living in a loving, nurturing home does more for your marriage than the actual structure you live in. This is not to say that you cannot have both…but it is to stress that life isn’t about stuff. It is about those meaningful moments that you cherish and hold on to that help to strengthen bonds and relationships.
In marriage, it is about resetting your priorities to ensure that you are living an abundant life rather than existing in the same space by going through the motions of adulthood. My husband and I do everything together; we do not just exist as two people living in the same space. Shared experiences can transform your marriage.
For every experience you share, a deposit is made in the “Love Bank”. When your life is so purposely driven towards oneness and shared experiences, you create such an abundance of deposits that it creates a buffer to withdrawals. It helps you to keep your eye on the bigger picture and remain focused on the positive.
Here are 3 simple tricks that will help you love your married life with your spouse.
1. Be adventurous.
Discover a way to step outside of the ordinary on a regular basis. Be adventurous, travel together and actually get away from your everyday life. This is a good way of resetting and recharging your lives. My husband and I travel a lot, we enjoy experiencing new cities and doing something exciting everywhere we go. We like road trips; it gives us time to connect, catch up or play silly road games and laugh.
2. Discover your thing.
You’re married…so you share something in common. Discover that and make it your “thing”. Anyone who knows my husband and I knows that we are foodies (actually traveling foodies because we will travel for food, but I digress). We keep a running list of restaurants that we want to try, we watch the food channel and we text each other exciting food finds. It’s our thing and it keeps us connected. Maybe it’s the love of the arts, horse racing whatever it is, discover it and use it to spark shared experiences.
3. Build a tribe.
I truly believe that healthy marriages are contagious. Having a solid group of friends creates a healthy supportive environment that enhances what you have as an individual couple. The camaraderie and fellowship promotes each couple to do more, love harder, live more abundantly. As you look forward to BBQs, game nights, couples trips and outings with your mutual friends, it enhances the life that you share together and solidifies your oneness as a couple.
BMWK – let us know below…what makes you LOVE being married?
Vanessa Thorpe of Louisville, KY is a wife and mother to four beautiful children. Recently obtaining her Master’s degree in Conflict Management, she has developed a passion for enhancing the lives of others in many ways. Vanessa is a devout Christian woman and community leader who lives by faith and is extremely passionate about building self-confidence, through the love of God, acceptance and positivity.