“Now I’m depressed, I thought he was the one.”
Especially in an early dating relationship, your emotions are on a high because of this new person that seems to have it altogether. You feel yourself showing signs of falling in love and then out of nowhere he disappears. Now you’re crushed and feel like your plans and dreams are over, that no one wants you, that your happiness is gone. This is a response in idolatry, putting the attention of a man before your personal time with the Lord. You pray for a man and to test you God sends one your way and what happens? You put God on the back burner. You wait in anticipation for the good morning messages from the new guy when your Father waits for you to say good morning. You look over warning signs and red flags because you see the good in people, but the reality is you are ignoring the intuition God gave you to wait and search out a matter before moving forward with this man.
You may have ignored God’s tapping on your shoulder or whisper in your ear about the man because you wanted to make it work with him. Repent if you realize that you’ve put a man before God. No one can love you and support you the way that God does. He is jealous for you, and putting anyone before Him will not be peaceful in the long run. Godly relationships are centered on Christ, not the person you’re in a relationship with.
If you’re single and desire to be married, consider your response to God’s call. Have you stopped calling on Him? Have you ignored His calls? Do you just gloss over His good morning and goodnight texts (in the Word) while waiting for your phone to buzz from a man? Sometimes God will allow you to bump your head in these relationships that go wrong because at the end of the day He’s training you to be solely dependent on Him. Depending on a man for direction could steer you off your purpose’s path if they are not truly for you.
What is the best way to respond when a man stops calling?
“I will wait on and trust the Lord.”
This is the ideal response to make when the guy you’re with no longer wants to be with you. It may be an attack on your self esteem, worth, or joy. Now this statement sounds like a typical response that we’d see in books yet you find it difficult to have that mindset when the emotional hurt and mental confusion are so real you can barely function properly through the day.
Let me remind you sister that you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you (Philippians 4:13); that taking a step back and just standing on God’s promise that He will cover you, restore you, avenge you, and never leave you. Waiting and trusting God is a daily thing and you deciding to take a step forward every day to trust His will, timing and way for your life. This pleases Him and frees you from your past and the ways you may have responded poorly before.
There are many other ways to respond to when someone you were hoping to build a future with just cuts out on you. It’s hard to not take it personally, but if we take the time to look past those natural, beautiful emotions, we can see what God wants us to see: the bigger picture, the dodged bullet, or His hand at work in it all.
Hey BMWK ladies, have you responded before when a man just walked away from trying to pursue you or be in a relationship?
kevwe says
Beautiful! Words of wisdom
Tatianah G says
Thank you, God bless!
Ebony says
Thank you so much for this. I am currently going through this in my life. I’ve ignored God while I was putting this man first. I am taking the vow from here on out..I am putting God first.
Nicole Dunbar-Willliams says
Thank you for this but what is crazy when I lose communication I let it go and give it to God but after a month or two he comes back. This has been going on for a year June 1st. I do not put him before God at least I don’t think so. I mean I still pray and give thanks everyday and go to church every Sunday. The peace is present when he is away I do speak my mind and let go. I am not sure why he keeps coming back. One think I can say is every time he comes back he seems better and a changed person. The off and on it such a turn off I am a little distance with him because I don’t know what he is up to. I do pray for Gods guidance with this and he tells me what to do but I don’t want to wait on this guys for nothing. I just done know about this friendship.
Aisha says
… this time he comes back, ask clearly and calmly for solid commitment (marriage for me, you best know your preference). He either decides to commit completely or leave. GOODLUCK
Aisha says
Thank you. I am a muslim but my faith is exactly the same. I am trusting Allah to plan best for me. Its simply not possible that put our faith in Allah and almighy lets us down. No way …
…. thank you. You have a beautiful mind and soul. Allah bless you.
His Chocolate Rose says
I am also currently experiencing this. I truly do enjoy reading your articles and I am a work in progress!!!