I can’t keep a man

This is a hard one but let’s start with this question: Was he yours in the first place? I know that is a harsh question, but some women are extremely guilty of fantasizing about a relationship and making it more than what it is. A simple example: Just because he said you look nice doesn’t mean he is madly in love with you. He only meant that you looked nice. And that’s it! Nothing more!

I am a firm believer that if a man wants you, he will tell you. You won’t have to figure it out, decode his conversations or interrogate your friends with their thoughts. And when a man tells you he doesn’t want you, he means it. He doesn’t want you. So no matter how much you do for him or how much sex you have with him, he will still not be your man. It goes back to respect. If you are giving a man the “world” for free with no demands or stipulations, he will take it. It doesn’t mean he is in love with you. It just means that he was just along for the ride. Ladies make sure that the effort that you are putting forth towards this relationship is being reciprocated by your potential mate. It should be an equal balance of give and take. Most importantly, be sure that the man you are trying to keep wants to be kept by you.

I want my own man

Don’t we all. And the best way to get your man is to love yourself, respect yourself and enjoy yourself. Do you! When you are busy taking care of you, you will be found. Too often, women are obsessing about a man, either getting one, keeping one or replacing one. Instead, spend that energy and time on you. Pursuing your destiny and fulfilling your God given purpose. And while you are focused on you and enjoying your life, your man, the right man will come.

I interviewed a variety of men ages 25-55 and asked what they found sexy or appealing about a woman and the answers were all the same:

1. Intelligent
2. Confident, a woman who knows her value and worth.
3. Friendly, outgoing, and fun loving.
4. Clothing, a fashionable dresser but leaves something to the imagination.
5. A woman who takes care of herself; hair, nails, etc.
6. A woman that challenges a man to be the best he can be.

Of course opinions will vary but at the end of the day, you want a man who wants you, loves you and wants to see you succeed. Please don’t settle. There is a great man waiting just for you. One that is worthy of you and you worthy of him. Wait for him. You will be glad that you did.

It really grieves me to constantly hear the horror stories from women regarding relationships that have gone wrong. We have all experienced the hurt, pain and devastation from making poor choices. But don’t let that pain go in vain. Pick up the pieces, learn from those mistakes and make a vow to put yourself first, to love yourself, respect yourself and to demand the best for yourself. I truly believe that you will see a difference in not only the caliber of men you attract but the person that you will become.

I wish you nothing but God’s best in every area of your life.

BMWK, can you relate to any of the 4 statements? 

Judi Mason is an Empowerment Strategist, whose mission is to empower You to become your best authentic self. As an accomplished author, Judi has garnered much success with her self-help books and workshops; including her popular Girl Talk: Relationship 101 events- which was birthed from her best-selling book, The Relationship Chronicles- Real Love, Straight Talk No Drama. As a sought after speaker, Judi uses multiple platforms from the marketplace to ministry; to enable individuals to pursue and fulfill their God ordained purpose with passion, in life, love and entrepreneurship.