by Harriet Hairston If you have taken the time out to look at the video associated with this imperative campaign, you will see the heart of the black community, ladies both young and maturing stating their worth and giving descriptions of their value. I commend Christelyn Karazin for making this the crux of the No Wedding, No Womb campaign designed to address the … [Read more...]
Forget Sex…I Need Intimacy!
by Harriet Hairston Well, first let me state that I don't really mean "forget sex." We all need some good yum-yum, and to totally disregard it is a misnomer (but it got you reading, didn't it?). However, it is my responsibility to let you in on an important fact for us ladies. For many of us, intimacy begins long before we hit the bedroom (or shower, or kitchen sink, … [Read more...]
Getting BACK TO THE BASICS–For Men Only: Become a “Love Doctor”
by Harriet Hairston I made mention of Bruce Wilkinson's book, "Experiencing Spiritual Breakthroughs" a couple of weeks ago, and after perusing my notes, I came across another "WOW" factor within his book. Keeping in mind that his book is Christian based, he outlined the specific instructions laid out in the Bible for different groups of people to follow: Wives: Submit … [Read more...]
BACK TO THE BASICS-For Women Only: “Submission” is Not a Curse Word!
by Harriet Hairston I made mention of Bruce Wilkinson's book, "Experiencing Spiritual Breakthroughs" a couple of weeks ago, and after perusing my notes, I came across another "WOW" factor within his book. Keeping in mind that his book is Christian based, he outlined the specific instructions laid out in the Bible for different groups of people to follow: Wives: Submit … [Read more...]
Books That Helped Me Find My “Marriage Mojo”
by Harriet Hairston In case you hadn't noticed, for the past couple of weeks, I've been giving various types of book reports about maintaining a positive attitude and helping your marriages thrive. In case you're wondering why, I'll tell you (and if you're not wondering why, humor me, OK?). I felt like I lost my "mojo" for a while. Much of what I was writing was very … [Read more...]
Stop Lying!
by Harriet Hairston Embellishments...exaggerations...stretching the truth...whatever you want to call it, if it's not the truth, it has no place within the confines of a marriage or any lasting relationship. In fact, I would venture to say that secrets and lies are the two hidden horsemen that spell out doom for a relationship once the funk hits the fan. Dishonesty … [Read more...]
Youknowwhatimsayin? Some Eye Opening Differences in Male and Female Communication
By Harriet Hairston Dr. Deborah Tannen wrote a book about the conversational style differences between men and women that really opened my eyes up to help me understand my husband better (as opposed to getting lost in translation so often). Although her book discussed many generalities, she broke those general assumptions down into more specific bite sized pieces. For … [Read more...]
Whatever You Dwell on Will GROW
By Harriet Hairston Sometimes life throws cliches at me that I never pay attention to until way down the line. Lately, the cliche that has been playing over and over again in my mind is this: "Whatever you dwell on will grow." There's something about the power within the mind that will attract the very thoughts a person has to itself. In high school, my coach would … [Read more...]
How to Combat “The Marital Slide”
by Harriet Hairston I read a book by Bruce Wilkinson that really opened my eyes to some of the negativity that I had allowed to enter my psyche regarding my marriage. He made it plain that no matter what happens externally in our marriage and general lives, how we respond is strictly up to us individually. Last week, Norman Vincent Peale provided us with tools to take … [Read more...]
Miss Celie’s Blues: What We Can Learn From Fantasia Barrino
by Harriet Hairston Sista, you've been on my mind... So...Fantasia Barrino attempted suicide because she was being implicated in an affair with a married man whose wife had had enough. Adultery, no matter what form it rears its head in, is damaging to all parties involved. Fantasia attempts suicide and spends the night in the hospital with a tube down her throat. Her … [Read more...]
How To Keep the Marriage Flame Burning
by Harriet Hairston For the past three or four weeks, I've been saturating my mind with principles from great men and women who were successful in every dimension of their lives. From Zig Ziglar to President Obama; Tyler Perry to Ghandi, I've learned that a principle is solid. It will work whether your intentions behind it are pure or not. However, there is one person … [Read more...]
Don’t Mess With Mr. In-Between
by Harriet Hairston There's a silly little song I heard when I was a little girl that has been playing in my mind as of late: You've gotta accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative and latch on to the affirmative. Don't mess with Mr. In-Between. Mr. In-Between and I had a love thing going on that almost wrecked my marriage. Let me tell you what he and his twin … [Read more...]
Men, Share Your Wisdom–Join the Husband ROLL CALL on BMWK!
by Harriet Hairston This past Saturday, For Healthy Marriages on Facebook started raining all kinds of simple wisdom for married men. For example, "Men, you do not need to bathe in your cologne...just a dab will do." This is a basic truth that will definitely draw a wife closer to the cavern in her husband's neck as opposed to repelling her and making her … [Read more...]
How Can [Insert Your Name Here] Be a Better Spouse??
by Harriet Hairston I've been doing a lot of soul searching lately. More accurately, a lot of self-checking lately. I think it's important to always take a good look in the mirror--even if you have to do so on a daily basis--and do a self inventory of what you can do better to love, support and communicate with your spouse. The main thing I have to continuously … [Read more...]
I’ll Take “Patience” for 500, Alex?
by Harriet Hairston It's just not smart to ask God for patience. I've learned more and more over the years that He is the master Comedian, and will make sure that a person gets what they want in a way that's unforgettable. The only thing is, in this particular instance, I didn't ask for it. I think it's the final frontier...the last clues for this episode of … [Read more...]