When people hear that I met and married my husband in 11 short months, they often assume we had a whirlwind romance. The truth is, while we were madly in love when we got married, we used our heads to make a good decision. That out of control, head-over-heels feeling is amazing and it's one you should enjoy when you're in love. But you also want to use your head so you … [Read more...]
Being Mary Jane Breaks Down the Sex-vs-Relationship Rules That Every Single Woman Needs to Know
For the past several weeks on BET's Being Mary Jane, viewers watched Mary Jane Paul put on a brave front as she faced betrayal, a near death accident, extortion, almost losing her job and the death of a dear friend. Her anxiety and loneliness could no longer be contained and Mary Jane reached out to her “friend with benefits,” Brandon. After carrying the weight of the world … [Read more...]
5 Ways to Reconnect With Your Spouse When You’re Not Feeling Each Other Anymore
After being married for a while, your relationship can change. Children, busy careers, and a home to manage are just a few of the things that can cause couples to drift apart while they try to keep up with the world around them. Feeling disconnected from your spouse is not always the result of a lack of love, infidelity, or some other major event. Many times, the disconnect … [Read more...]
These 5 Qualities Could Mean Your Man’s a Keeper
There are so many losers out there. How do I know? Well, thankfully it’s not because I married one. I know because I’ve dated a few in the past and I have heard more than enough stories from friends and family to know that you’ll run into a loser at every turn if you aren’t careful. But for all the losers floating around, there are also a ton of great men. I know that for … [Read more...]
FREE – Three Part Video Series on Love & Money!
The two biggest areas that can impact your happiness are your relationships and finances. And the two go hand-in-hand. You see, poor financial decisions cause stress in your relationships. And poor relationship choices most certainly can devastate your finances. Our friends over on the Grown Zone, Zara Green - personal growth trainer and Alfred Edmond Jr.- business and … [Read more...]
5 Warning Signs that You’re Wasting Your Time with the Wrong Man
A man who can’t be upfront with you about where he stands on marriage, in general, and a relationship with you, in particular, will most likely waste your time. And the last thing a smart, successful sister needs to do is waste her time! Here are 5 warning signs you're wasting your time with the wrong man: 1. You believe him when he says he wants commitment Maybe he told … [Read more...]
4 Ways to Graciously Keep Nosy and Negative Folks Out of Your Marriage
You don’t have to defend your marriage to anyone, but you should do what is necessary to protect it. There will be people in your life who feel as though they have the level of maturity, wisdom or experience to inform you on what is best for your marriage. There will also, unfortunately, be others who have hidden agendas with regard to your marriage. It is a sad reality that … [Read more...]
Single Ladies: 3 Things You Think You Know About Black Men that Are Absolutely False
Have you or one of your girlfriends ever said the following words? "Black men are intimidated by my success" "I'm beginning to believe there are no men out there who are serious about marriage..." "All the good men are marrying outside the race" These sayings feel true, but in reality they're myths that are messing up our relationships! Let's deal with them, one by … [Read more...]
3 Roadblocks that Get in the Way of You Meeting Mr. Right
If you're single and you don't want to be, you may be facing relationship roadblocks that are getting in the way of you meeting Mr. Right. In my experience, these roadblocks take the form of limiting beliefs. Beliefs shape our feelings, perceptions of others, and everything we say and do. They feel like the truth, but really they're just stories we've told ourselves to make … [Read more...]
3 Ways the Strong Black Woman Syndrome Can Kill Your Relationship
Can we talk? Sister to sister? No, I'm not about to tell you that the reason why you're still single (or unhappy in your relationship) is because you're too independent and no man wants you. (That kind of advice is played out in my opinion, and doesn't serve you well.) I am, however, going to tell you that the Strong Black Woman Syndrome is killing you and your … [Read more...]
5 Things You Must Expect From Your Man
At an early age I realized a few things in life. One of them is that people are going to treat you the way you let them treat you. When you have low expectations, you don’t get much from folks. But when you raise the bar—showing people that you know your worth and nothing less than respect will do—well, people tend to shape up or find their way out of your life. When we … [Read more...]
4 Reasons Why You Get Stuck with Mr. Wrong and What to Do About It
One of the biggest mistakes I see sistas make is choosing the wrong man. But worse than that, I see many sistas staying with the wrong man. I coach many women who feel torn because they can't make up their mind. Should I stay or should I go? If you feel stuck with the wrong man, let me share 4 reasons why this keeps happening to you and expert advice on what to do to move … [Read more...]
Secrets From The Barbershop: 9 Signs A Man Is Ready For A Relationship
Now that I’m Team Natural, I get my hair cut at the barbershop. And sistas, you won’t believe the secrets I get to hear when I’m there! (Yes, the guys talk about relationships when you’re not around). I recently had a chance to talk with one of the guys there about what he’s looking for in a woman. In fact, any time I’m around a professional, high-quality man, I’m always … [Read more...]
Can Your Mind-Set Set You Up or Hold You Back?
We are all connected to each other in some way on some level. However, we identify certain individuals to develop more distinct and defined connections with. Some people find it incredibly difficult to explain why or understand what so strongly attracts and connects them to an individual. The only thing they are able to offer with certainty is that they are inexplicably … [Read more...]
Is the Need to Be Right Ruining Your Marriage?
I don’t mind being wrong. I know, you probably think I am lying, but really, I don’t mind at all. What I do mind is talking to people who will go to their grave swearing they are right about something when, as far as I see things, they are dead wrong. The problem is, who makes the determination about what’s right and wrong in your marriage? Even if you swear you are right, … [Read more...]