by Aja Dorsey Jackson A little while ago I was sent a group picture that included a friend who recently got married and became a father. Although his name was listed under the picture, I had to look at it about four times before I realized that he was actually there, and that he had just gained so much weight in that short period of time that he was now unrecognizable to me. … [Read more...]
Fathers, We Still Need You
by Aja Dorsey Jackson This week, a study was released stating that children of lesbian couples were better off than those of straight couples. The study was funded by several gay advocacy groups and tracked 78 women who became pregnant through artificial insemination. There was something that bothered me about this article. I have no interest in debating the issue of gay … [Read more...]
I Confess…. (A Married Mom Comes Clean)
by Aja Dorsey Jackson Shortly after the birth of our son, my husband and I went to a party together. To make a long story short I had maybe one drink too many and said something borderline crazy and inappropriate to him afterward. To my surprise he laughed and said "There's the woman I married. I missed her." His statement caught me off guard and made me examine what it was … [Read more...]
Would You Get Surgery to Get Your Sexy Back?
by Aja Dorsey Jackson First let me say that I am grateful that my pregnancies were fairly kind to my body. I didn't have much trouble losing the baby weight and wasn't left with too many unpleasant physical side effects. I can even look half decent in a bikini if the bottom half falls right below my belly button. The problem? The lower part of my abs look like they have … [Read more...]
Blended Families Week: You’re Not My Daddy!
by Aja Dorsey Jackson It all started with broccoli. One night a few years ago, when my now 10-year-old was about seven my husband, who is not my daughter's father, noticed at dinner that she was trying to avoid eating her broccoli by pushing it around on her plate (that "trick" never seems to die). "Eat your broccoli." He told her. She proceeded to nibble on the top … [Read more...]
Should Black Women Start Dating Men of Other Races?
by Aja Dorsey Jackson Actress Regina King sparked controversy recently with an essay she wrote for Vibe Magazine encouraging Black women to consider dating men of other races. King writes: "Of all groups of people, Black women are the least likely group of women that will date outside of their race. When you have everyone else who is willing to explore but a Black woman … [Read more...]
NEWSFLASH! “Jump-Offs†Don't Have Rules
by Aja Dorsey Jackson In the wake of what seems like weekly high profile affairs between married men and talkative mistresses I have had the unfortunate opportunity to tune into various radio shows with DJs and callers voicing their opinions on the topic. What disturbs me about these conversations is that rather than acknowledging the devastation that participating in an … [Read more...]
Do Your Kids Have Cell Phones?
by Aja Dorsey Jackson My 10-year-old has been begging me for a cell phone for what seems like five years now. For her eighth birthday I bought her the generic version of the Disney phone. It gave her the capability to call four people; her dad, my husband, my mother, and me. After the novelty of the phone wore off and she got tired of calling the same four people, … [Read more...]
The List: Should You Have a List Of Requirements For a Potential Mate?
by Aja Dorsey Jackson Since the debut of TLC member Chilli's dating reality show "What Chilli Wants" there has been a lot of conversation over her list of dating requirements. While it is not my place to tell another person what should or should not be important to them, in my opinion Chilli should change the name of her "perfect man" list to "the reason why Chilli will … [Read more...]
Are All Men Really Dogs Or……
by Aja Dorsey Jackson The "All men are dogs" conversation is one that I decided a long time ago that I would no longer entertain. Why? Because with only a few exceptions this conversation only comes about in one of two ways: 1) The woman in the conversation has decided to knowingly date a man who was involved, crazy, or was not looking for a serious … [Read more...]
Spoiler Alert: Review-Why Did I Get Married Too
by Aja Dorsey Jackson As opposed to the first film which seems to answer the question "Why Did I get Married", the sequel seems to ask "Why would anyone ever get married?" If I were to go by the marriages that I saw in this film my answer might be "No one really should". I know that a movie about four couples that were happy for the whole film with no conflict … [Read more...]
What Song Takes You Back to the Beginning?
by Aja Dorsey Jackson It's funny how a song can completely transport me back to a very specific time. The right song can engage every one of my senses. I automatically know what I was seeing, hearing, what was going on around me, exactly how I felt, even the outfit that I was wearing at that exact moment. There are quite a few songs that take me back to our early dating … [Read more...]
Dear New Girl: I Don't Like You. Don't Take It Personal.
by Aja Dorsey Jackson Once upon a time there lived a wife. She and her husband would often hang out with the husband's friends and their wives or significant others. The wife enjoyed this as she got along well with the women and had developed friendships with several of them. One day one of the couples splits up, which saddens the wife because their split means that she … [Read more...]
Can You Stand the Rain?
by Aja Dorsey Jackson My former coworker gave birth to her baby sixteen weeks early, at the end of her fifth month of pregnancy. He was only one pound, six ounces, and was smaller in length than a ballpoint pen. That was nearly three years ago, and her little boy still suffers from a myriad of problems ranging from cerebral palsy to life-threatening food allergies. In … [Read more...]
Where Are All The Men?
by Aja Dorsey Jackson The other day a former client of mine stopped by my office briefly to tell me about a new business venture. He is a single Black man in his mid to late twenties. When he left, my coworkers, all women, all but ran back to my office asking questions about him as though they had just spotted Big Foot. For a moment, I was confused by their reactions. After … [Read more...]