It has become a well-known fact that women cheat in relationships as often, if not more than men. Though the stigma is more often attributed to the husband, wives shouldn't get comfortable and think they can't be found to step out on their men. A cheating spouse is a cheating spouse no matter the gender. Cheating Spouse: 5 Signs You Could Be Cheating on Your Husband You … [Read more...]
Spouse Cheated? 30 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Calling It Quits
After infidelity in our relationship and prior to making a decision to call it quits, I thought long and hard about what to do. Notice I did not say the “D” word! If you are like me, you have learned over the years the seeds you plant and nurture will take root and grow. Therefore, I have made it my business to intentionally not allow myself to even … [Read more...]
5 Lies You Tell Yourself When You Decide to Cheat
Lies...lies...lies! Your marriage heads for rough waters when you make a decision to go outside of your relationship with your spouse to get a certain need met. You make excuses that seem plausible because you are convinced that need can't be met within your marriage. But, while it's different strokes for different folks, there are five lies you tell yourself when you decide to … [Read more...]
Here’s the One Thing You Must Do If Your Spouse Is Cheating
Have you reached a point in your marriage where you suspect something shady's going on but you're not sure? Now, you simply have to know what’s really going on? Like I always say, “You cannot conquer that which you will not confront.” So, in this article that is part of chapter four (Confront & Conquer) in my book entitled Love After Adultery: The Breakthrough Journey of … [Read more...]
I Am in Love With a Married Man: How Do I Let Go?
Dear Dr. Buckingham, I have been dealing with a married man for a while and I know its wrong, but we just got caught up. I want to walk away and just let it all go, but I didn't know it would be this hard. I fell in love with him and I don't know how it happened. I don't want to do this anymore. I Am in Love with a Married Man, How Do I Let Go? Please help, Ms. … [Read more...]
Here’s Why You Shouldn’t Judge People Who Choose to Save Their Marriage After an Affair
Let’s keep it real. In today's society, it has become way too easy to slap judgment on someone for just about any reason. Now imagine having the label of cheater. Maybe you are like me and know all too well what that feels like so you don’t have to imagine. Well, the flip side of this is being the spouse who was cheated on. With judgments being freely handed down, there's a … [Read more...]
6 Fatal Mistakes Husbands Make After Their Wife’s Affair and How to Avoid Them
By: Dr. Shane Perrault, PhD You just found out your girl — or worse your wife — cheated. Ouch! That cheating #@&%^ #%$@! you say, but, much to your surprise, you still love her. What now? Leave, stay, forgive, forget? Your heart was just ripped out, your sense of trust is long gone, and you are outraged. So, why do you find yourself unable to leave? You always thought, … [Read more...]
Can Two Broken People Make Marriage Work?
Dear Dr. Buckingham, My husband and myself have been together 15 years, married 10, with two beautiful children. I have had several emotional affairs, two were sexual.He has caught me every time. In the last two affairs though, I felt done with the marriage. I was the working parent struggling mentally and physically. He did nothing but took care of the kids, no housework, … [Read more...]
Revenge Cheating: 5 Ways it Sabotages Both Marital and Individual Recovery
"Last night was well worth it!” Imagine reading this text message on your husband’s phone. How would you react? Well, I don’t have to imagine and I can tell you exactly how I reacted...minus the cuss words of course. Being cheated on can cause you to lose your religion! The interesting dynamic in our marriage is that we both cheated. Neither of our affairs was … [Read more...]
Don’t Be a Sucka! 5 Signs that Your Man Is Playing You for a Fool
I’ve always hated the phrase “love conquers all.” Don’t get me wrong, I am all about romance and happily ever after, but I have seem enough in my lifetime to know that love does not conquer all. Love is wonderful and magical but it isn’t enough. Have you ever heard a woman share how much she love's a man, but it's really her way of justifying his mistreatment of her. It … [Read more...]
3 Reasons Why Forgiveness in Your Marriage is a MUST
You’ve been in your relationship for years, and although you’ve made mistakes, you believe they are pretty minor compared to the devastating mistakes you’ve accepted from your spouse. Maybe she cheated on you. Maybe he squandered away a huge chunk of your savings. Or maybe, it’s a long list of smaller issues that have you realizing this relationship is not what you … [Read more...]
Insecure Season Finale Gives 2 Brutal Relationship Lessons for Men And Women
WARNING: If you've still yet to watch the season finale of Insecure, there are major spoilers in this article. Who knew this would turn into such a debate? If you watched the season finale of Issa Rae's breakout hit HBO show, Insecure, then you know why everybody is talking about it. Within a week of the finale's first airing, social media sparked a debate about … [Read more...]
Women Say There Is Only One Reason Why Men Cheat. As a Man, I Completely Disagree
Probably like many of you, I consume a lot of social media content. I watch a lot of videos and listen to a lot of podcasts. Recently, a video caught my attention that promised to tell the one and only reason why men cheat as told by a woman. Did it matter that a woman was uncovering this reason? I will admit, it did make it interesting to hear how women form ideas about … [Read more...]
This Black Woman Refuses to Date within Her Own Race; Here’s Why
Yesterday while scrolling through my news feed, looking for interesting content to read on Facebook, I came upon a meme that more than satisfied my appetite for literary consumption. The meme featured a couple in a noticeably suggestive pose. It was a photo of a very attractive black woman straddling a handsome white man, but that's not what prompted me to write this article. … [Read more...]
Adulterous and Abusive Wife: Do I Have Grounds for a Divorce?
Good afternoon Dr. Buckingham, My wife and I have been married for 19 years. I will admit the marriage has been on rocky ground from day 1, with the exception of the birth of our children. My wife has been verbally abusive the majority of the marriage; she yells and screams at our kids and rarely apologizes when wrong. A few years ago, I read a text message my wife wrote to … [Read more...]