After being married for a while, your relationship can change. Children, busy careers, and a home to manage are just a few of the things that can cause couples to drift apart while they try to keep up with the world around them. Feeling disconnected from your spouse is not always the result of a lack of love, infidelity, or some other major event. Many times, the disconnect … [Read more...]
3 Reasons Why You May Not Be Getting the Respect You Want From Your Wife
I’ve been married for over seven years. And though that's not an eternity, it's long enough for me to be grateful that I still feel like I married the right guy. He still gets me. He still makes me laugh. He still supports my dreams. He still provides for us. I think I did pretty well. I respect my husband, not just because he’s my husband and I love him, but also because … [Read more...]
The Radical Parenting Move that Just Might Change Your Marriage
I have to admit, I am a little envious of couples who live in towns where they are surrounded by family. And not just any family members, but family members who are actually willing to help out by watching their kids. It’s definitely a blessing. I love where I live. My neighbors are friendly, my kids are happy, and life is pretty good. But, we don’t have much family near by. … [Read more...]
3 Things You Can Do in the Next 24 Hours to Improve Your Marriage
I think we can all agree that 24 hours isn’t a ton of time. How often do you hear people say that they wish they had a few more hours in the day? I know I’ve said it more than I care to admit. But I think we can also agree that a whole lot can happen in 24 hours. A whole lot! First, let me be clear. I make no claims that the tips in this post will fix your marriage in one … [Read more...]
5 Sure Fire Signs You Like Your Spouse
Years ago, I remember seeing First Lady Michelle Obama in and interview where she was asked about her secret to being happily married. I distinctly remember her talking about how she really likes President Obama. That was the heart of her answer. Nothing really deep. Just her sharing how much she genuinely likes the man that she promised to spend the rest of her life with. It … [Read more...]
3 Things I Don’t Need from My Husband (and Why It Makes Our Marriage Work)
I make it my business to make my husband feel needed. I think it’s important for the people you love to know that you need them. I know that being needed by those I love matters to me. It matters to most of us. Wanting to feel needed is truly just a part of the human experience. That said, I definitely don’t need my husband for everything. I think need has it’s place and … [Read more...]
Are You Disappointed in Who Your Spouse Has Become? Here’s What You Can Do About It
I’ve always been a little skeptical about people who marry potential. I think it’s great to see what someone is capable of, or what that person might become down the line, but just because you see the potential doesn’t mean they ever will. I believe the only way marrying someone for their potential works out well is if that person sees their potential, too. And it’s not … [Read more...]
Is Your Marriage Stuck in a Rut? Here Are 3 Successful Marriage Makeover Tips
Like all things in life, being married can get stale. It doesn’t mean the love has faded or the marriage is in huge trouble. It’s just a part of the normal flow of life that can happen to the best of us. When you look at all the responsibilities that come with being married, particularly if you are also raising children, the days can easily become a blur, and paying … [Read more...]
Should You Get Married If You Aren’t In Love?
I often hear people say they love someone but they are not in love with the person. Typically that means they’ve grown to care for someone deeply, but the romantic feelings that come with being in love have either faded, or they were never there to begin with. I love my husband and thankfully, I am in love with him too. With time, our love has grown, and I am grateful that … [Read more...]
Not What You Signed Up For? Easy Tips for Managing the Unexpected in Your Marriage
A few years ago, my husband mentioned that he wanted to be a volunteer firefighter. It threw me off guard because I married a corporate guy with an IT degree and experience in operations and project management. I thought, where is this firefighter stuff coming from? To be honest with you, that was really the extent of my thought process. After all, people always say they … [Read more...]
6 Things You and Your Spouse Need to Discuss Today
We are halfway through the year and everyone around me is assessing their personal goals and determining what’s next as they plan for the remainder of the year. I get it because I am busy doing the same. But while stressing over my health and business goals I realized that I was actually leaving out a very important thing; assessing my marriage and family goals. When the … [Read more...]
How Do You Cope with a Traumatized Spouse?
Dear Dr. Buckingham, My marriage is just 9 months old. My wife is pregnant and I lost my job 6 months ago. I try doing other things to provide for the family but, it's not easy. My wife works and her salary is OK for us but I know it's my responsibility. I know she expects more from me but, I've been unable to find a job. Recently, she has been very angry. She calls me … [Read more...]
5 Unexpected Things that Can Threaten Your Happy Marriage
One of the most challenging things about marriage is developing the ability to successfully manage the unexpected. Your marriage can be going wonderfully and out of nowhere something happens that throws things off balance. And it usually isn’t some major incident or event that leaves your marriage in a weird place. Often times, the simplest day-to-day aspects of our lives can … [Read more...]
3 Reasons Why Trying to Change Your Spouse Will Bring Resentment Before Acceptance
Even though most of us know how hard it is to change anyone, including ourselves, we often enter into relationships with expectations that are not in alignment with who our mate is. Despite the love and affection we may have for the person we married, we sometimes think that maybe—just maybe—the love we have for them will magically change some quality we don’t care for. But … [Read more...]
8 Things You Need to Accept for Your Marriage to Work
Years ago, when I started dating my now spouse, I would get so annoyed because he had such a hard time planning things in advance. Now, we have been married for almost seven years, and guess what? He still has a hard time planning things in advance. Do I still get annoyed? Not as often, but occasionally I do. Over time I have come to realize that many of the problems that … [Read more...]