In a recent article, I talked about the "labor of love" that is necessary to keep your marriage strong. I pointed out that "labor" means so much more than just "work." It involves bringing a conceived love to life. In other words, giving birth. So what do you do when the very thing you gave birth to begins to die? How do you handle marriage problems that have become terminal to … [Read more...]
6 Critical Questions to Ask Before You Think About Divorce
I wish we lived in a world where everyone is happily married, but in real life, I know that is far from true. Many people are unhappily married and the reasons why are plentiful. Some unhappy marriages can turn into happy ones if both parties are willing to put in the work. Others will fail even if measures are taken to save what once was. Sadly, in some cases, divorce is … [Read more...]
3 Things You Should Never Ever Say to Your Husband
After 8 years of marriage and more than 20 years of friendship, my husband and I have had our share of ups and downs. We have a good thing going, but neither of us is perfect. We’ve each made mistakes, for sure. And what keeps us together and happy is not just how we manage things when mistakes occur, but It’s also how we treat each other at all times. I always knew that I … [Read more...]
My Husband Doesn’t Put Our Marriage First and Allows His Mother and Kids to Disrespect Me
Dear Dr. Buckingham, My husband has kids from another relationship. And I'm struggling because my husband does not put me or his marriage first. His kids and his mother have a great influence on him. And I am disrespected by all of them, and I'm tired of it. We have been through three therapists and nothing has worked. My last resort is to see a male therapist who may get … [Read more...]
Not Getting Any From Your Wife? 5 Reasons Why (and What You Can Do)
We’ve all seen and laughed at sitcoms with the same old storyline. The husband messes up, the wife gets annoyed, and her revenge involves a promise to deny him what he seems to want most: sex. It’s hilarious when we see it on television, but what happens when that sitcom becomes your life? It’s not so funny anymore. Using intimacy as a way to express anger or frustration … [Read more...]
But He Says She’s Just a Friend; So How to Tell If She’s Really a True Friend or a Side Chick?
Hi Dr. Buckingham, My husband spends more time with his female friend than he does with me. We live together and have been married for four years now. He says that he is not going anywhere, but he continues to lie about his interactions with his friend. I love my husband and take my marriage vows seriously, but I am wondering if my husband feels the same. At times, I think … [Read more...]
Help…My Mom is Just Plain Rude to My Husband. What Should I Do?
Dear Dr. Buckingham, I've been married for four years now. Both my husband and I have been in and out of work, and as a result we lost our home. We moved in with my single, elderly mother. I eventually got a job and my mother told my husband he had to get a job soon or leave her home. Unfortunately, he did not find a job and now resides with his mother. His family has never … [Read more...]
I Wanted a Happy Marriage… And Here Are 7 Things I Did to Get It
After 17 years I still remember shopping for my wedding dress and finally selecting the one that nearly brought tears to my eyes. My wedding day had been a dream of mine since I was a little girl. While I envisioned the details of the wedding, I had no idea what type of wife I should be. I didn't have many examples around me when I was coming up, so I had to wing it. What I … [Read more...]
Wake-up Call: 3 Things that Are Truly Getting in the Way of Your Happy Marriage
Whenever you set goals, whether general life or career, you should envision achieving your desired outcome. It is also important, and necessary, to set an honest timetable to fulfill your dreams. Additionally, a crucial part of goal setting is being aware of possible obstacles that could affect your success. If it's for business, the challenges usually include scarcity … [Read more...]
How Do You Hold on When Your Spouse is Financially Unstable for 10 Years?
Dear Dr. Buckingham, I read your article about how to hold on when your spouse is financially unstable. I have a question. How do you hold on when your spouse is financially unstable for 10 years? I understand that marriage vows state for better or for worse and the Bible states that love is patient and long suffering, but how long is "long suffering"? We have a … [Read more...]
How to Overcome the 6 Most Common Marriage Dilemmas
Never go to bed angry, keep others out of your relationship, and be a freak in the sheets are all marriage tips we’ve heard time and time again. All are great pieces of advice, but sometimes a bit challenging to execute. Certain behaviors and ways of thinking prevent us from applying the love lessons we’ve learned. During the planning phase of a wedding, we aren't usually … [Read more...]
How Can I Trust My Wife If She is Dishonest? Does She Deserve to Be Trusted?
Dr. Buckingham, A few years back I discovered my wife having secret phone calls and text messages from an old high school flame. After some extensive research, I found out this guy has been in the background for years. Mind you, my wife is in her mid 30s but has been in contact with this guy since high school. He even asked her to marry him more than once while we were … [Read more...]
Men: 3 Attitudes that Are Causing Stress in Your Relationships
There will be always be a certain amount of stress in all of our relationships. No two people are ever going to agree on everything. And there are also other challenges that we face in communication and intention as well. But with that being said, there are also certain attitudes that we, as men, have that cause undue stress in our relationships. So I want to offer three … [Read more...]
4 Reasons to Stop Using Divorce as a Problem Solving Tool
For the love of God, would you please stop using divorce as a way to solve marital problems!? For the last few months, I’ve been giving relationship advice on my website. People have been submitting their questions privately, using an alias to protect their true identity, and I respond directly to their email address. Nothing gets posted online. And let me tell ya…yall … [Read more...]
Why Sexual Rejection is So Difficult For Men
Sexual rejection is an issue most men I know deal with on a consistent basis. It's why most of us are reluctant to approach a women for a date or even approach our wives for physical companionship. Rejection in any form is difficult for any of us, but sexual rejection is something that really tends to hit home for men, so here's a quick insight into why your man may take it so … [Read more...]