Tension is bad. Really, really bad. When we're tense, we're not as easygoing, not as carefree, not as willing to laugh at a corny joke, or give our spouse the benefit of the doubt. While any number of things can cause the tension, there's one surefire way to help relieve it: busting out the lotions and body oils and getting a serious head-to-toe rubdown. If done properly, … [Read more...]
{Be A Better Spouse Challenge} Tip #17: Make Peace With Your In-Laws
Be honest: Could your relationship with your in-laws use a little work? Are you as nice as you could be? Do you let past events dictate your current behavior? If you didn't get off to the best start with your in-laws and you know that friction is causing headaches for your spouse, make some adjustments in your attitude - starting NOW. Now that you are married, YOU are part … [Read more...]
Wedded Bliss: Through Sickness and In Health
Who can't resist a great love story? You know we can't. That's why we were glad our friends over at BlackBridalBliss.com shared this beautiful tale about a woman....and her car. Tisa Rabun was sick and tired of being sick and tired about her car, so the independent woman that she was made her way to a car dealership to fix it. "I decided to buy an SUV; it was about 7 p.m. … [Read more...]
{Be A Better Spouse Challenge} Tip #16: Turn Off The TV (And The Cell Phone…And The Computer)
We spend so much time online these days it's a wonder we still remember how to interact with each other without a keyboard in front of us. Think about it. How often are you hanging out at night, one of you on the couch, the other in his or her favorite chair, and one or both of you is doing work, or watching TV, or laughing out loud at a joke someone posted on Facebook? How … [Read more...]
White Board Economics: Create A Solid Financial Foundation Before You Say “I Do”
by Tyrease Dixon I have been married for almost seven years to my best friend and high school sweetheart. I love my husband dearly. He's a wonderful provider and an amazing father. I'm so glad I said, "I DO!" However, our tidy romance wasn't always smooth sailing. He proposed on July 31, 2003, and we settled on July of the following year for our impending nuptials. … [Read more...]
{Be A Better Spouse Challenge} Tip #15: Go On A Genuine Date Again
Remember the anticipation that was built into going on a date with the person that is now your spouse? The mixture of excitement and effort put into how you looked, working out to keep that body tight because you know he or she loved the fact that you cared about yourself. Finding the newest, hottest spots to hang to make that lasting impression --- making sure the car was … [Read more...]
{Be A Better Spouse Challenge} Tip #14: Have Your Own Friends
It's nice to be one of the girls or one of the guys or whatever combination of friends your spouse has. But when you don't have your own stash of friends, these experiences can create an imbalance in your relationship with your spouse which has the potential to cause you to become resentful of your spouse's friendships and if left unchecked even suspicious and jealous of … [Read more...]
Does A Bad Start Have To Mean A Bad Finish To Your Relationship?
by Edward C. Lee Any good love story begins with, "Once upon a time" and ends with "...and they lived happily ever after." But what about when our real life relationships neither start nor end like a fairytale? I pose the question, because I recently had dinner with a friend of mine that is going through a divorce, after more than 15 years of marriage. Pretty sad turn … [Read more...]
{Be A Better Spouse Challenge} Tip #13: Volunteer
Sometimes it's good to do something for someone else. You might be thinking right now, I do something for these kids and [Insert Spouse's Name Here] every day! But that is what you're supposed to be doing. Serving others through volunteerism is a quick and easy way to gain perspective on yourself, your world and the people closest to you. Should you be open to the … [Read more...]
“Marriages Don't Fall Apart Overnightâ€
By Tiya Cunningham-Sumter My heart just bleeds for the ex-wife of Dwyane Wade. Recently Dwyane was awarded sole custody of his children. I thought of his wife because I empathize with the emotions she must be feeling. I thought of her many times as I heard of his new relationship and how he appeared to be moving on. As I shared my concern for her during a conversation … [Read more...]
{Be A Better Spouse Challenge} Tip #12: Live As Though It’s Your Last Day Together
How often do we take our loved ones for granted? It's human nature to grow accustomed to how things are and become comfortable. But in doing so, we can let pettiness and small insults fester. We harbor resentments and hold our apologies, all because we know there will be time to resolve the situation later. "I'll show my appreciation another time," we tell ourselves. … [Read more...]
Change Doesn’t Happen Overnight
by Tara Pringle Jefferson An ongoing struggle throughout our short marriage has been the division of labor in our household. I've often felt like I'm shouldering 90% of the day-to-day work, while my husband gets the seasonal tasks of shoveling the driveway and mowing the lawn. We've tried 3,232 ways to make it work but we always seemed to end up in the same place: Me, … [Read more...]
Getting To Better Communication
By Edward C. Lee The last few months I have taken up this challenge to work toward improving the communication between me and my wife. It is a challenge prompted by a weeklong visit by my parents. On one of the nights that they stayed with us I woke up around 3am and was doing some reading. As I walked around my house I could hear my parents talking in the guest room. My … [Read more...]
I’m A Better Wife When…
Over my four-year marriage, I've noticed that year four was better than year three, that year three (while challenging) brought more insight than year two, and year two was more comfortable than year one. Each year, it seems, has brought us closer together, whether we realized it at the time or not. I feel this growth in our marriage is directly related to our growth as … [Read more...]
…But Can You Forget?
By Edward C. Lee Last week I wrote a post on the connection between forgiveness and intimacy. From that post, I received several comments related to what has to be the next step after we forgive, and that is - the difficulty of forgetting. I really appreciate those comments about how hard it is to forget, because I think we all face tough situations where the memory just … [Read more...]